Pacman Jones: I’ll take two

Yup, that car is covered in crystals. An ice mobile. Bling on wheels. And while it seems to have nothing to do with sports, I argue it has everything to do with sports. Why? Cuz athletes make up a predominant proportion of the market that’s willing to drop dime on literally coating something with diamonds.

Can’t you just picture T.O. riding around with his diamond-studded face plastered across the hood of his Hummer? Or the Pacers’ backcourt evading a hail of gunfire because the street lights gleamed off their platinum “You shoot worse than we do!” bumper sticker? Or Pacman Jones for that matter:

“Yea, you that crystal dude? I want one a-them cars like that. Cept no Eagles or shit. Strictly bitches. Crystal bitches…. And throw in that Mariah, too”

It’s actually called Crystal Art, and there are greeting cards, murals and a $250,000 car, apparently. Anyway, the more I think about it, I guess it doesn’t have that much to do with sports and just more to do with showing off a car made of crystals. And to write “Crystal bitches.”


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